Saturday, September 1, 2007: how about being a missionary?
i was thinking about long term missions today. at NPD we were praying for various countries and it made me feel so blessed to have so much and yet they struggle to find peace. it made me think about the freedom we have to worship God freely, about the freedom that Jesus came down to give everyone on this earth.
i have so much to give, i have so much things that i can offer.
my time, my money, my talents, my faith.
except, i dont know if i can survive one year being in a foreign country.
persecution, war, chaos, etc.
looking to paul, and being the narrowminded person i am, i cant see how he could stay so close to God and how he could remain joyful even after everything that he went through, to bring others to knowing Christ.
but then again, arent i just putting my own interest above what God has commissioned everyone to do?
my security, peace, image, life, social circles, wealth.
i look to the korean missionaries being held by the taliban and i think, God must have really blessed them with His boldness and His strength to even survive one day under the captivity of the taliban. i look to the long term missionaries from church in africa, i think of how much they have to leave behind: family, friends and their jobs to persue after God's interest. i look at glenna's parents, and how they're sowing seeds into the people of hong kong, and again i'm amazed at what they have been doing.
again and again, i have been reminded of how God provides, be it in an ordinary OCFers life to how dependent all these missionaries are on God to just provide even their daily necessities; food, water, clothes.
i dont know what God is impressing in my heart right now, and looking at current circumstances, family, mentally, economically, spiritually, things dont look very good. doors seemed closed, very tightly shut.
sometimes i wonder why its so hard to choose the right step. prayerfully, by God's grace and by His plan, maybe i will have an opportunity, somewhere, someday.
a shout of praise.
7:52 PM
